Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Marriage Advice: What Couples Need To Do To Keep The Spark Alive

All marriages inevitably go through some rough patches. It's just impossible to spend more than 50 years (God willing) with a person and never have any difficulties. But one of the most telling signs of rough waters ahead is when you start to give up things you used to love together.
Early on in dating, there is almost non-stop smooching, texting just to see how the other person is, and butterflies in the stomach. I know when my now-husband and I started dating, I couldn't think about anything else but him, when I was going to see him again. Things have changed, though, 12 years later. I still adore him, but some things -- kissing, hand-holding, staying up all night talking -- have fallen by the wayside. They shouldn't, though. Here are seven things married couples need to take from newly dating couples:


1. Holding hands: Sometimes you should hold hands like you are in middle school. We all know you graduated to sex years ago, but remember a more innocent time when his hand around yours could make you squeal?


2. Flirting with each other: For some reason, married couples always let this one go and they need to STOP that. Flirting is the way men and women communicate. So bat those eyelashes and brush his knee in a dark theater. Let it send a thrill up your spine.


3. REALLY listening to his/her stories: We have heard each other's stories a million times and tend to get bored. Well don't. Really sit and listen to his tales. Hear about his day at work and rediscover the man you married.


4. Trying new restaurants: The kids shouldn't stop your exploration. Visit news places, eat new foods, and go on adventures. You will be much happier.
5. Buying little gifts/flowers: When you are dating, these things are part of the package, but they quickly fall away as you get deeper into marriage. Stop that! Make it happen again. Bring home flowers for no reason or small trinkets you saw that he might like.


6. Dressing up: Change out of those sweatpants once a week and care about what he thinks about you again. I promise it will make many things happen all over again.


7. Butterflies: Remember how he used to make you feel? Do your best to remember that and get that butterfly feeling again. It's just appreciation, pure and simple. Nothing feels better.

What have you stopped doing that you would like to do again?

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