Ah, wedding planning. It brings out the best and the worst in people. As a bride-to-be, you're probably trying really
hard to not become a bridezilla, but also realizing just how hard it is
to bite your tongue. While you understand that it's in everyone's best
interest for you to listen to the old adage, "if you don't have anything
nice to say, don't say anything at all," we get that there are some
things you wish you could just get off your chest. Here are the 11
things every bride wishes she could post to social media for all the
world to see, but probably shouldn't.
1. "GAH. My parents seriously need to STOP. This is MY wedding, not theirs!"
If your parents are hosting the wedding, and especially if they're
footing the bill, chances are they're going to have some strong opinions
about how everything plays out. From the food being served to whether
or not there's a receiving line, they're going to have ideas and they
won't be afaird to let you know what they are.
2. "Thanks EVERYONE, but I didn't ask for your opinion."
Once you get engaged, everyone you know is going to start sending you
unsolicited wedding advice. You'll quickly learn what dress your mom
thinks would look best on you, what your bridesmaids think your first
dance song should be, and why hiring a DJ is so much better than booking
a band. One minute your friends and family might be asking about your
engagement story, and the next, they'll be judging all of the choices
you've made.
3. "OMG. If I get ONE MORE cheeseboard, I will punch someone."
It's nice to get gifts and all, but when you start getting duplicates
(or quadruplicates...) of the same thing, it's like enough already. You
registered for a reason. You wanted ONE vase, not six.
4. "Hey, pregnant sister...I really, really don't care if you think you're going to look fat in your bridemaid dress. No one is going to be looking at you anyway."
At some point during the wedding planning process, one of your
bridesmaids may announce that they're having a baby. Sure you'll be
excited for her and will love that child like it's your own, but you
just don't have time to worry about how she's going to look at your
wedding. You have enough to worrry about...like how to get some killer
#bridearms.
5. "Attention bridesmaids: Being tardy to the party is NOT cool."
You may find that some of your bridesmaids develop a punctuality
problem. While you don't want to be a bridezilla, if the shower invite
says noon and you don't show up until 12:45pm, that's just plain rude.
Cue Stephanie Tanner.
6. "Can someone please explain why I have to
invite [my boss/my dad's golfing buddies/my grandma's mahjong partners]
to the wedding?! I don't even know/like them." The guest list
is always a hotly debated topic because everyone feels like thier
contribution to the list is the most important one. Be prepared to have a
few freakouts over who gets the invite and who gets the snub.
7. "So...not to brag or anything, but our wedding
is going to be SO much better than every other wedding in all of
history because [we're having Cirque du Soleil dancers/I'm going to sing
a song at the reception/we're just that awesome]." You're
going to think this way at some point during the planning process,
especially when you have a great idea, hire a fabulous vendor, or find
the PERFECT venue to host the wedding of your dreams. How could anyone
else's wedding be THIS amazing?!
8. "[Newly engaged friends/new parents/new
homeowners]: It's cool that you have something amazing going on in your
life, but can we PLEASE focus on ME for a little bit? K, thanks.
Weirdly the world keeps on spinning while you're planning your wedding,
so people are going to have fun thigns happen to them throughout the
months leading up to your big day. It's inevitable, but it doesn't make
it any less upsetting when people stop talking about how exciting your
life is right now.
9. "I just don't get it. How is it THAT hard to send back your RSVP?!"
Ah, the dredded RSVP deadline. There will always be those friends and
family members that just can't get their act together to be able to send
their RSVPs back in time, even if you give them WEEKS to respond.
10. "WHY DOESN'T MY [FLORIST/WEDDING COORDINATOR/PHOTOGRAPHER] RESPOND TO ANY OF MY EMAILS/TEXTS/PHONE CALLS?! #iampayingyou"
By the time the wedding rolls around, nightmaring vendors is going to
be your favorite pasttime. We get it, you're busy, but your questions
should definitely take priority.
11. "[147/112/87/32] days until I get MAAAARRIED!!! #soexcited"
Don't you wish you could do a daily countdown to your wedding? It's
just as big of a deal as the dawning of the new milennium was, after
all. Since Times Square wouldn't agree to do a balldrop, Price should at
least write a song for you: Gonna party like it's the night before my
wedding.
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