Your bathing suit is packed away and your summer vacation is
long gone, but the passion that comes with summer love doesn't have to
end. Whether you're headed out for a first date, or have been married for years, these fall date ideas are the perfect way to celebrate the seasonal weather and get that lovin' feeling. That's because each one of these date ideas is supported by science! (We're nerds, we know.)
As a couples therapist and dating coach, I help couples
increase their relationship satisfaction by implementing a more
strategic dating life. Capitalizing on love research to get the most out
of your date night is a surefire way to have a hot and thriving love
life. So, if you need more romance in your relationship and are stumped on finding new activities, try one of these seasonal date ideas.
Leaf Peeping
Ogle the bright red, yellow, and orange leaves as you stroll hand in
hand through a local park, or better yet, go on a hike that gets you out
of the city and into nature. Exercise and exploring the unknown
activates the pleasure system in your brain and releases dopamine, the
chemical that gives makes you feel good and exhilarated.
Apple Picking
Pick a sunshiny beautiful day to frolic in the orchards together,
canoodle behind a tree, and help each other reach the highest bunches.
Plus, sunlight makes you happy, so soak it up before you go into winter hibernation mode.
Pumpkin Carving
You may be too old to go trick or treating, but you're never too old to
carve a pumpkin! Enjoy a little flirtatious competition: whoever creates
the best pumpkin masterpiece wins something (wink wink)! Plus, being
creative allows you to relax, and activates parts of the brain
associated with emotional responses and the release of dopamine.
Haunted House
Boo! Jump into each other's arms as you're startled and reap the benefits — surprise activates the reward center in your brain. Going on a date with an element of surprise, risk and excitement can help you rekindle the romance.
Corn Maze
This is the perfect opportunity for teamwork! Does your partner listen
to your ideas, get angry when you wind up in a dead end, or praise you
for your great sense of direction? Negative communication patterns, such as criticism or defensiveness have been shown to lead to breakups and divorce, so make sure you support each other.
Cozy Picnic
Bust out the basket and plaid blanket! Just make sure to touch or
snuggle up as you enjoy your wine and cheese. Physical touch is not only
a popular love language, but it's also a way we communicate our emotions, such as love, gratitude and happiness.
Halloween Costume Shopping
Head to a costume shop or thrift store and laugh together as you try on some whacky outfits. Laughing and smiling cause the brain to release dopamine, making you feel happy. Plus, eHamony
found that a sense of humor is the most desirable quality in a partner,
so let lose and reconnect. You may just feel the same spark that
initially attracted you to each other.
Ultimately, boredom is the silent relationship killer.
Prioritize your partner, date your mate and take advantage of all of the
fun activities the fall season has to offer. There are so many creative
ways to boost connection, intimacy and happiness in your relationship.
Just remember you have to mix things up to (pumpkin) spice things up!
Sex after marriage isn’t as much of a snoozefest as you might think.
Life gets busy, people get tired and sometimes sex just isn’t high on the priority list for married couples ― especially those who have been together a long time.
Though there’s no “normal”
when it comes to how often spouses get it on, some couples make their
time between the sheets a regular part of their relationship. Oh, and
they enjoy the hell out of it too. Below, 14 people on the secret-sharing app Whisper open up about the saucier side of sex after marriage.
For most couples, the weeks leading up to your wedding will feel anything but romantic. You may find yourself overwhelmed with last minute details and shaken up by the inevitable pre-wedding jitters.
If you're looking for ways to take a deep breath and enjoy some quality
time with your partner before you say "I do," here are seven romantic
things you can do the week leading up to your wedding — which may
actually help you cross off some items on that outstanding to-do list.
1. Reenact your first date.
Go back to the very first place you met and pretend to have your first
date all over again. Order the same food you ate — or walk the same path
you took a stroll on post-dinner. It will bring you back to your roots
(and may even help you write your vows!).
2. Spend a night looking through old pictures.
Reminiscing with old memories and letting every inch of love seep into
your relationship pre-wedding is always a good idea. Looking through old
photos (whether on the computer, phone, or printed) will take you on a
trip down memory lane — and may help you put together a last-minute
slideshow for your rehearsal dinner or reception. Spend the night
reliving all the funny and special moments you shared throughout your relationship.
3. Surprise each other with a date night.
Pick a night the week (or two) before your wedding and plan a secret
date filled with the other person's favorite things. Consider this your
final stretch of dates before you become spouses. It will most likely
relax you and bring you back to center before the big day.
4. Head to the spa.
What better way to relax the week before your wedding than spa treatments?
Do a couple's massage or facials together — which of course will leave
you both feeling relaxed, rejuvenated, and glowing for those photo ops.
5. Go wine or cocktail tasting.
Find a local wine, whiskey, or beer tasting
locale and head there for a night out. If you're still trying to decide
on your signature drink, this is the perfect way to kill two birds with
one stone. Take the night to have a pre-wedding toast together with
your favorite drink of choice, and if it's delicious and special enough,
it may end up being present on your big day.
6. Take a couples' dance class together.
It doesn't hurt to learn some new dance moves before your wedding —
especially if you or your partner are prone to having two left feet. If your first dance
is one that's particularly complicated or you just want to get some new
moves under your belts, opt for a private dance lesson to get you both
more comfortable twirling around in front of everyone.
7. Send each other a video.
If you're spending the week or a few days before your wedding apart from
your fiancé, send them a homemade video that lets them know how excited
you are for a lifetime together. This will be a great keepsake present
that you can replay year after year, and it can even go in a part of
your wedding film. Talk about a heartfelt win/win.
Every couple is different. While your perfect date night out
might be a raucous night on the town, that could be another
Netflix-loving couple's nightmare. But no matter your personal tastes
and past times, our experts say that the happiest couples do these things every day.
1. They have leaving and coming back together rituals.
According to Lesli Doares, marriage coach and author of Blueprint For A Lasting Marriage,
research supports the idea that couples who have a ritual of greeting
and leaving one another — whether that's when they first wake up or when
they head off to work — have happier relationships. Why? "Because you
are making a conscious effort to seek each other out," Doares says.
"These times aren't taken for granted but intentionally acknowledged."
2. They touch base throughout the day.
Couples who keep in contact also keep one another's spirits up, says psychotherapist and relationship coach Toni Coleman.
"That means touching base throughout the day by phone, text, or email
just to say hi, tell one another you're thinking about the other, or to
check in about your plans for the evening," she says. "How nice it is to
know we are a priority to our partner — even when we are apart."
3. They have uninterrupted one-on-one time together.
And not just for a few seconds. The happiest couples soak up quality
time for no less than 15 minutes each day, Doares says. "When you are focused on each other
for more than a few minutes, you get past informational exchanges and
can engage in deeper conversations that create connection," she
explains. "Making this time a priority that isn't competing with
children, text messages, TV, or emails shows how important nurturing
your relationship is."
4. They share a laugh.
Happy couples get their giggle on whenever they can. Perhaps you spot
something seriously funny on the sidewalk and snap a photo for your
spouse, or you make a habit of sending one another corny jokes as a way
to break up an otherwise boring day. "The point is, something makes you
laugh and you want to share this with your partner," explains Coleman.
"A shared sense of humor is an important part of relationship
chemistry."
5. They give each other at least one sincere compliment.
The happiest couples make a habit of making one another feel good. Why?
Because regular compliments will do more than give you love a confidence
boost. "The time you spend identifying something positive your partner
does keeps you learning about them and really noticing what they bring
to your life," says Doares. "It keeps the negativity that is so
destructive to relationships at bay. And, it also keeps you from taking
those positives for granted."
6. They tell each other "I love you" in the love language of choice.
There are many ways to make people feel loved, from quality time to
buying gifts. The happiest couples understand their partners' love
languages and speak them. "Some people like to hear words, others
appreciate acts of service, while others need a hug or kiss to feel
loved," says Doares. "Learning your partner's love language and speaking
it daily leaves no doubt about how you each feel about the other. It
also shows a willingness to go out of your comfort zone to let them know
how you feel in a way they best understand."
7. They go to bed at the same time if possible.
Finally, says Doares, "settling in together at the end of the day is a great way to increase intimacy — and not just sex.
Your last words and thoughts will be with each other and this is can
increase your sense of security with each other. And, yes, it will
increase the chance of being physically intimate with each other as well
— and that is almost always good for your relationship."
Everything’s coming up roses for Kornelius Bascombe and his new fiancée Rachel Jordan.
On July 23, Bascombe popped the question
to Jordan, his girlfriend of four years, atop the Citibank building in
Los Angeles. At first, Jordan thought she was there for a romantic
couple’s photo shoot. But what her boyfriend had in store was even more
romantic ― a proposal he had been saving up for for three years. During a
special shot with rose petals, while Jordan’s back turned towards him,
Bascombe got down on one knee.
“She turned around, threw the flowers in the air and my heart
dropped,” Bascombe told The Huffington Post. “It was such an amazing
moment because all I could do was think about how much I loved her and
how much she meant to me.”
“It would mean so much to me
if you spent the rest of your life with me,” he told her in the video.
“I know you’ll make a great wife and an even better mother.”
Jordan accepted the proposal, of course. Then an elated Bascombe
screamed at the top of his lungs, “She said, ‘Yes!!!’” and literally
swept his bride-to-be off her feet.
Jordan told ABC News that she is still in shock about the swoon-worthy proposal.
“But the great thing about him is [that] he shows me that level of love every day,” she said. “He makes me a very lucky woman.”
Afterwards, the couple took a helicopter tour over downtown L.A.,
dined at a rooftop restaurant and went out dancing with friends.
The pair first met at a pep rally at North Carolina State University in 2010.
“A lasting relationship doesn’t happen overnight,” Bascombe told
HuffPost. “It takes obstacles and challenges to strengthen a
relationship, and I believe the things that we’ve been through as a unit
have prepared us for life together.”
Wishing these two many more wonderful years together!
Whether you're in need of some
inspiration for writing your vows or need help preparing for a big
toast, these quotes will bring out the Shakespeare in you.
By:
Jenna Hastings
Writing
your own vows is a popular (and beautiful) way to personalize your
ceremony, but sometimes, finding the right words can be tricky. Or maybe
you're preparing to make a toast and need a little inspiration to make
your speech one-of-a-kind. To help you out, we've compiled our favorite
wedding-appropriate quotes, ranging from what it feels like to fall in
love to how to weather the ups and downs of marriage. Read, write, and
be inspired!
“Once in awhile, right in the middle of an ordinary life, love gives us a fairy tale.” —Unknown Author
“And I knew exactly how old Walt Disney’s Cinderella felt when she found her prince.” —Elizabeth Young
“When you look for the right person, you always end up with the
wrong one. But when you just sit by the corner and wait, he comes along
and shares the corner with you.” —Unknown Author
“When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with
somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.” —When Harry Met Sally
“I’m feeling alive and with every breath that I take, I feel like I’ve won. You’re my key to survival.” —Secondhand Serenade
“You know when you have found your prince because you not only have a
smile on your face, but in your heart as well.” —Unknown Author
“For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.” —Judy Garland
“For you see, each day I love you more Today more than yesterday and less than tomorrow.” —Rosemonde Gerard
What is Love?
"You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.” —Dr. Seuss
“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.” —Lao Tzu
“When I sleep, I dream of you, and when I wake, I long to hold you
in my arms. If anything, our time apart has only made me more certain
that I want to spend my nights by your side, and my days with your
heart.” —Nights in Rodanthe
“Love is life. And if you miss love, you miss life.” —Leo Buscaglia
“I love you, not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am
with you. I love you, not only for what you have made of yourself, but
for what you are making of me.” —Roy Croft
“To find someone who will love you for no reason, and to shower that
person with reasons, that is the ultimate happiness.” —Robert Brault
“A hundred hearts would be too few to carry all my love for you.” —Unknown Author
“You will find, as you look back upon your life, that the moments
when you have truly lived are the moments when you have done things in
the spirit of love.” —Henry Drummond
“Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences,
penetrates walls to arrive at its destination full of hope.” —Maya
Angelou
“Love doesn’t make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.” —Franklin P. Jones
“In the arithmetic of love, one plus one equals everything, and two minus one equals nothing.” —Mignon McLaughlin
“It is love that makes impossible possible.” —Indian Proverb
“Walking with your hands in mine and mine in yours, that’s exactly where I want to be always.” —Fawn Weaver
“In dreams and in love there are no impossibilities.” —Janos Arnay
“Two souls with but a single thought; two hearts that beat as one.” —Friedrich Halm
The Meaning of Marriage:
“A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.” —Mignon McLaughlin
“The groom always smiles proudly because he’s convinced he’s
accomplished something quite wonderful. The bride smiles because she’s
been able to convince him of it.” —Judith McNaught
“You don’t marry the person you can live with … you marry the person you can’t live without.” —Unknown Author
“Grief can take care of itself, but to get the full value of joy, you must have somebody to divide it with.” —Mark Twain
“Sexiness wears thin after a while, and beauty fades. But to be
married to a man who makes you laugh every day, now that’s a real
treat.” —JoAnne Woodward
“Being someone’s first love may be great, but to be their last is beyond perfect.” —Unknown Author
“You make me happier than I ever thought I could be, and if you let
me, I will spend the rest of my life trying to make you feel the same
way.” —Friends
“What greater thing is there for two human souls, than to feel that
they are joined for life — to strength each other in all labor, to rest
on each other in all sorrow, to minister to each other in all pain, to
be with each other in silent unspeakable memories at the moment of the
last parting? —George Eliot
“A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers.” —Robert Quillen
“A good marriage is one which allows for change and growth in the
individuals and in the way they express their love.” —Pearl S. Buck
“The greatest marriages are built on teamwork. A mutual respect, a
healthy dose of admiration, and a never-ending portion of love and
grace.” —Fawn Weaver
“The highest happiness on earth is the happiness of marriage.” —William Lyon Phelps
The Ups and Downs of Marriage:
“In a marriage, each partner is to be an encourager rather than a
critic, a forgiver rather than a collector of hurts, and enabler rather
than a reformer.” —Unknown Author
“The real act of marriage takes place in the heart, not in the
ballroom or church or synagogue. It’s a choice you make on your wedding
day, and over and over again and that choice is reflected in the way you
treat your husband…” —Barbara De Angelis
“Coming together is a beginning; keeping together is progress; working together is success.” —Henry Ford
“Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same.” —Emily Brönte
“Grow old along with me; the best is yet to be.” —Robert Browning
“When the darkness rolls in, I’ll be there through thick and thin.” —Hilary Duff
“I don’t know where I’d be without you here with me. Life with you makes perfect sense. You’re my best friend.” —Tim McGraw
"Because today, when I look into your eyes, my love for you only
grows. It’s even stronger now. My love will never waver. And this I vow
to you, today, and always and forever.” —One Tree Hill
“There is no such thing as a perfect man or a perfect marriage. But the one I have is perfect for me.” —Fawn Weaver
“Remember, we all stumble; every one of us. That is why it’s a comfort to go hand in hand.” —Emily Kimbrough
“The beauty of marriage is not always seen from the very
beginning…but rather as love grows and develops over time.” —Fawn Weaver
“I wasn’t sure that love could survive everything we put it through, but you were. You were sure, you were always sure.” —Boy Meets World
“Before we met, I was as lost as a person could be and yet you saw something in me that somehow gave me direction again.” —Nights in Rodanthe
“Marriages, like a garden, take time to grow. But the harvest is
rich unto those who patiently and tenderly care for the ground.”
—Darlene Schacht
“Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful and endures through every circumstance.” —Corinthians 13:7
Here at How He Asked, we read through countless proposal stories
every week, and we truly find every single one of them romantic,
adorable, and beautifully unique. Some of the most jaw-dropping ones,
however, are from couples that have overcome some of life’s toughest
obstacles together. We consider ourselves lucky to be able to share
their stories with the world. Below, find some of the most inspirational
stories we’ve read so far.
Shortly after this beautiful couple met, Cody’s family was struck
with tragedy. Ashleigh was there to comfort him through the loss of both
his parents, and for their proposal, he recreated the first date, when
he told his parents he knew she was the one.
Read the full story here: Romantic Rooftop Proposal
Brittany and Ben
At 26 years old, and 9 months into their relationship, Brittany was
diagnosed with breast cancer. Ben said he already knew he wanted to
marry her, but with surgery scheduled in just two weeks, the time felt
right. During what was supposed to be a pre-surgery party, he got down
on one knee to propose.
Full story (and video): Breast Cancer Proposal
Bonnie Kate and Max
This video will have you completely in
tears. Max’s absolute dedication to the woman he loved, even when she
showed no signs of returning the sentiment, even through months of no
communication when Bonnie Kate was deathly ill in Haiti, and even more
so after her injury in the Dark Knight theater shooting in Aurora,
Colorado. Their story is almost too beautiful for words.
There’s something so moving about love
found through tragedy. James was waiting at the finish line of the
Boston Marathon in 2013 when the bombing occurred. During recovery, he
fell in love with Krista, his rehabilitation nurse. “I now realized why I
was involved in the tragedy,” James said. “It was to meet my best
friend, and the love of my life.”
Friends since middle school, this couple
survived the 1999 Columbine High School shootings together. They fell
apart after high school, but reunited and fell in love just a few years
later. They shared a love for the Dave Matthews Band, and Samuel
proposed to her at one of their concerts.
Soon after the beginning of their
relationship, Justin was in an accident that put him in a coma, and when
he woke up, he was paralyzed. He stayed strong through his recovery and
therapy, and Lauren was always there for him. It became clear the two
were meant to be together forever. On their second anniversary, a little
over a year after the accident, Justin walked to Lauren, got down on
one knee, and asked for her hand in marriage.
This heart-breaking story of a dying father
and his wish for his daughters will have everyone in tears. Evans was
diagnosed with cancer after receiving a double-lung transplant, but he
could not withstand chemotherapy treatments. With just months to live,
this father wanted to walk his two unmarried daughters down the aisle
and renew vows with his wife before crossing the rainbow bridge.
When Becky’s sister passed away, she started to see her sister’s
birthdate pop up everywhere – on the clock, documents at work, even her
total at the drive-thru. When Marcus proposed to Becky they couldn’t
help but notice the time stamp on their proposal photos read 7:13, her
sister’s birthday! It was just what Becky needed to know her sister was
smiling down on their engagement.
After being diagnosed with Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma right before
Valentine’s Day earlier in the year, Tamara went through several
treatments of chemotherapy. On the 6th and final treatment Lucas swept
his high school sweetheart off her feet with this heartwarming proposal.
Melea and her dad were best friends so when
he was told he only had a short time to live, she wanted nothing more
than for him to see her get engaged before he passed. Spencer had been
nothing but an angel to her and her father, but she never expected him
to make her dream proposal come true at Disneyland. Melea was so happy
that her father was there to witness it all the day before he passed
away.
“Dr. Benjamin Simmons and Mr.
Anthony Newby with their wedding party at VanLandingham Estate,
Charlotte, North Carolina on March 19.” - Tonya Russ Price
“Could this family be any more
darling?! Chris and Via’s elopement taught me to go with the flow during
family sessions, to forget perfection in favor of truthful candids, and
that some little girls won’t be taking off their puffy pink jackets for
photos no matter how much you plead with them.” - Nicole
“What do you do on your wedding day
if you love ‘Game of Thrones’? You have a sword fight! Kate and Jason
enjoyed every minute of their wedding this weekend!” - Keith Hitlin
“Amanda and Sean got married on the
last day of winter in St. George Island, Florida. The rain held off for
the lucky couple. It was a beautiful and very intimate beach wedding.”
- Christophe Z
12
Mara Opperman
“I just got married this past weekend. This is me and my husband Vincent Sideli.” - Mara Opperman
“Anna Manville and Andy Cerqueira
were married in a gorgeous destination wedding on Vieques Island, Puerto
Rico, on Saturday, March 19.” - Sandy Malone
“Whitney and Tom walk together to their wedding ceremony after their first look this past weekend on the Jersey Shore at Bonnet Island Estate.” - Hooman Bahrani
15 Robyn Rachel Photography/Instagram “One of my favorite moments is when
the bride and groom get to see their reception room for the first time
all done up. This sweet couple privately practice their first dance and
it was magic!” - Robyn Rachel
Illustrator Andrew Hou had trouble expressing his love for his wife with words, so he decided to do it through art instead.
HJ-Story
"Love is thinking you're beautiful doing the simplest things."
Andrew is Chinese, but he
was born in Canada. His wife Kate (a.k.a HJ) is Korean. The
pair, married for five years, lives together in Seoul, South Korea.
"Korean not being my native tongue didn't help either," he told The
Huffington Post. "So making silly, sappy doodles was my workaround for
the problem."
HJ-Story
"Love is doing the things we love together."
HJ-Story
"Love is saving the last for you."
Andrew started the series, titled "HJ-Story" after the initials of his wife's Korean name, in 2010. It began as a personal blog but ended up gaining a large fanbase along the way.
HJ-Story
"Cuddling you is the best thing in the world."
HJ-Story
"Love is picking me up when I'm down."
Earlier in their relationship, Andrew and Kate used the illustrations as a way to stay connected.
"[Kate] was busy with school and I was busy with work, so we didn't
have a lot of time to meet up or even talk on the phone," he said. "So
during work, I'd pretend to be 'working' and create these tiny doodles
and send it to her on her cellphone."
HJ-Story
"Me going to work vs. me going to see you."
Once he had accumulated
enough doodles, Andrew started posting them online. As the site got more
popular, he turned the rough sketches into the more polished drawings
you see today.
HJ-Story
"Love is memories."
HJ-Story
"Love is learning to love what you love."
Through his work, Andrew says he hopes to give viewers a greater appreciation for the small moments.
"We're all so busy and caught up in everything that we forget about
the little moments that are important -- myself included," he said.
"Drawing HJ-Story for me is not only to capture the moments of a
relationship, but to remind me of the little moments that are easily
forgotten."