Photo of the Week

This Photo of the Week is from my Love, Scott. I got the idea to get little white boards to put in the bedrooms and kitchen as reminders for things we needed to do and list we needed to write. The board in Scott and I's room has become our board of love notes to each other and this is what I found when I got home last night... He so sweet.


80 days until the Queen marries her King.

Groomzillas Can Be Worse Than The Scariest Bride

Some reality television producer is going to make a mint one day when they realize that the groom can be the scarier half of the wedding couple. The cameras are on the wrong person. Although not as common as a bridal freak-out, when it happens, it's a hideous experience for everybody working for that wedding. I've suffered through more than my fair share of "Groomzillas" in the past five years, but there were certainly a few that truly stand out in my mind. It's certainly proof that weddings can bring out the worst in anyone.

In my experience, grooms participate in the wedding planning in one of the three ways: 1) Helping the bride plan every aspect of the wedding, and working together as a team during the wedding weekend to entertain the guests, 2) Participating in the planning only with regard to large money decisions and choosing the bar for events, 3) Showing up where he's told, wearing what he's told, when he's supposed to be there. As long as he arrives on time and says 'I do,' there are no other expectations. These are the ones you've gotta watch out for.
Most of the grooms who have turned into complete jackasses have fallen in Category three -- as in, they weren't involved in the planning at all so I was totally in the blind when Groomzilla arrived. Once I meet them, I totally understand why the bride has excluded them from the destination wedding planning process.

The award for most memorable Groomzilla would go to the firefighter from Texas who didn't do anything to help his bride with the planning and called me "Candy" all weekend. When he arrived 20 minutes late to his own ceremony and the spot had already been chosen and chairs set up (if you're late, you take what you get or nobody will have a seat when they arrive), he freaked out because he'd wanted it done differently. As the guests gathered, he screamed and yelled and cursed at me and had all of his friends tear apart the wedding setup and redo it facing another direction. By the time the bride arrived, he was filthy and sweaty and apoplectic. It wasn't rational on any level. All he needed to do was be on time for his own wedding, but since he didn't, we did our best to set it up for them. Being sober would have probably gone in his favor too. Alcohol can usually be pointed to as a key factor whenever a client has a psychotically disproportionate response to something during their Caribbean destination wedding weekend. But it was definitely memorable. I wonder if they're still married. She was very friendly during the planning but I never heard from her again, other than her whispered thanks when she gave me a quick hug goodbye at the end of the reception. I still think she looked scared.

Then there was my gangster wedding from the West Coast. Not to ID anybody, but my husband Bill looked up the gang signs they were spontaneously throwing in candids all weekend and now we know where not to vacation. Or where to market our services. But anyway, the groom wasn't a part of the planning and seemed to be a gentleman all weekend, til the wedding reception came to an end on their wedding night. We'd made arrangements for an after party but he decided that they were going to stay at the villa and party, and that I wasn't going to shut down the bar or music. Wrong-O. It all happened in a split second -- one second after I said "no" to him for the first time all weekend. He started bouncing around like a lottery ball and screaming at the top of his lungs "Ignore this b*tch. We are staying here. The party is here!!!" and other such ridiculous nonsense. I ended up cancelling their after party at the bride's request, and then having to call back and try to put it back together after the bride slapped her new husband and restored calm. It was freaking crazy. They are still happily married and she's hopefully in charge.

The drunken texter probably came closer to getting hit by a member of my staff than any other Groomzilla. This was another MIA groom until they arrived on Vieques, where he made quite a name for himself by falling overboard during a fishing trip (after barfing) and then stripping to his boxers at his own beach party. He got into a disagreement with his embarrassed bride and almost hit her, prompting our caterers and my husband to get all their panties in a wad with what they were gonna do to the guy if he took one more step at the bride. Of course, both of their families were standing there watching all of this so I'm not sure what exactly made us think it was our problem. But we did. Anyway, the guy texted me all wedding weekend with stupid, rude or angry text messages. After the wedding, he proceeded to keep me on his drunken text distribution list for years. Then all of a sudden they stopped. Sadly, this couple is no longer together. Happily, the bride is still in one piece and sounds better than ever.

Weddings are an emotionally-charged time in people's lives. Frequently, a wedding shows off the talents of the couple -- organization skills, crafty creativity and such -- but sometimes true character (or lack thereof) is revealed when the chips are down. If you're getting married and the "worst" side of your intended rears its ugly head, I suggest you take a step back and make sure you know exactly what you're vowing to take for "better or worse" because if you think that wedding planning is the most stressful thing you'll ever encounter together, you have a big reality check coming.

Until next time, happy wedding planning from Weddings in Vieques and Weddings in Culebra!

Cute Seating Card Ideas - Project Wedding

Cute Seating Card Ideas - Project Wedding

Best Dancing Kick-Off Songs - Project Wedding

Best Dancing Kick-Off Songs - Project Wedding

Music Monday: Robin Thicke - The Sweetest Love

Pros and Cons of a Long Engagement

Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth got engaged in June, but they're in no rush to walk down the aisle. "Life is too short not to be with the person you want to be with," Cyrus said in a recent interview. "I don't really care about the wedding or the piece of paper as much as I do the promise we've made to each other. And we want to have a long engagement."

At BG, we're no stranger to the idea of a lengthy engagement — web editor Kristen O'Gorman Klein was engaged for two years, and web producer Stefania Sainato will be engaged for three years. Here's what we've learned about the benefits and drawbacks to having a longer-than-average engagement.

THE PROS

Photo Credit: Rebekah J. Murray Photography
Time to Build the Life You Want and Prepare for Marriage

 One of the best parts of having a long engagement is that it gives you breathing room to focus on your career, get a sense of what your partner will be like as a spouse and decide what you both want for your marriage (living plans, when to have children, etc). It's a commitment towards a future together—one worth waiting for. My fiancé and I decided to get engaged because we were ready to take that next step after dating, but our plans to tie the knot in 2012 were derailed when his physical therapy program added an extra year to their requirements. An extra 365 days is a small price to pay for finding the person I want to spend the rest of my life with! Plus, since we're still relatively young (we're both in our mid-twenties), it gives us a small window of opportunity to enjoy some "me" time before the "we" factor starts to kick in more after we're married, when it's not quite so easy (but still important to spend separate time alone or with friends). — Stefania

Avoid Wedding-Planning Stress—and Fatigue

 Let's face it—planning a wedding isn't easy. After basking in the newly-engaged bliss for a few days, I started thinking about the nitty-gritty details of planning a wedding. I instantly felt overwhelmed—and totally out of my element (I wish I worked at Bridal Guide back then!). But, if you give yourself sufficient time to plan, you can avoid that stressful, panicky feeling that you're behind schedule. You can tackle a few projects—say, booking the venue, finding your photographer, choosing a DJ—and then take a break for a few months. Since my husband and I started so early (we booked the venue within a month of getting engaged), it was okay for us to shut down wedding-planning mode for a few months when the fatigue threatened to hit us. We worked out a timeline—and gave ourselves plenty of down time and breathing room. — Kristen

More Time to Save Money

 When we first started researching venues and vendors, we experienced major sticker shock that dramatically increased our financial needs. Our parents' generous contributions weren't going to cover much more than the costs of the venue and photographer. With our target budget in mind, my husband and I were able to set reasonable monthly savings goals. At times, we really worried that we weren't going to have enough money. But, by the day of the wedding, we had reached our goal with less than $100 to spare. We truthfully could not have pulled off the wedding of our dreams with less time. — Kristen

Spend Less by Booking Vendors Early

 My fiancé Jason and I booked our venue so early that we were able to lock into 2011 pricing, even though our wedding isn't until 2013. This turned out to be a godsend, since we found out that they raise the price per plate about $15 to $20 each year, and we have a hefty guest list (we both come from big families and have lots of shared friends in common). Our long engagement also allows us to research vendors more thoroughly than if we were getting married in a shorter time frame, so we've been able to negotiate lower prices and take the time to truly find the perfect planning team for our needs. I recommend signing up for a credit card with a great rewards program and charging as many wedding-related purchases as you can (within your means, of course) so that you reap the investment. After we got engaged, Jason and I both chose the JetBlue Amex to rack up miles for our honeymoon. So far, I have about 39,563 miles, which is enough for one of us to fly from New York to San Francisco and back. — Stefania

THE CONS

Photo Credit: Jayd Gardina Photography

Seeing Others Get Engaged and Married Within Your Engagement Time Span

 Three couples that we're close with got engaged months (one even a year) after us, and they will all be married by the time they attend our nuptials, and that's okay with us. Each couple has their own unique circumstances—emotional, financial, future goals—so I am a strong believer in choosing the right time frame for you and your fiancé, regardless of outside influences. That being said, I can't lie: There are times when you may receive an invitation in the mail, hear a bride gush endlessly about amazing plans you can't make yet or be subjected to snarky comments ("Hey, didn't so-and-so get their ring after you did?"), all of which can add up to the emotional equivalent of being sucker-punched. My best advice is to put blinders on, stay focused on the wonderful future ahead of you, be the better person that genuinely shares in other couples' happiness (and also learn from their planning mistakes). Think of it as great training for the who's-buying-their-dream-home-first race, who's-having-a-baby-first race, and all those other "races" that you have to look forward to... — Stefania

Family Circumstances Can Change

 In The Five-Year Engagement, the bride's mom is pressuring her to set a date by saying, "Grandparents do have a tendency to die." Cut to a scene at the grandma's funeral, and the mom says, "This is why we do not delay weddings!" This was, sadly, my reality. When I first told my grandma that my wedding would be in two years, she joked, "I hope I live that long!" That joke became much less funny when she did, in fact, pass away unexpectedly four months before the wedding. It was heartbreaking to know that she would've been able to attend my wedding—the first of her grandchildrens' weddings—if we hadn't opted for such a long engagement. If you have sick and/or elderly relatives, you may want to seriously take that into consideration when setting your date. — Kristen

More Time to Second-Guess Yourself

 Did I choose the right photographer? Is my venue really the best fit? Do I still love my dress? These questions circled around and around in my head during the months leading up to the wedding. When you book everything so far in advance, it becomes harder to remember why you fell in love with that particular vendor in the first place. With a shorter engagement, you simply don't have the time to worry about that. — Kristen

Idea Overload!

 The night that Jason proposed to me, after celebrating with loved ones, I felt this strong need to start planning our dream wedding, like RIGHT NOW. I will never forget the look on my (well-intentioned) Mom's face when I showed her wedding favors with a seashell motif a night or two later, asking what she thought. "Isn't it a little…I don't know…early for that?" she said. Now, with two years of experience under my belt, I wish I could go back to pre-engaged me and gently tell her to enjoy the newness of it all instead of worrying about becoming the next David Tutera. Brides-to-be with a long time to wait will be bombarded with twice the amount of ideas than those who are tying the knot soon, so expect your plans to evolve more often than theirs might. P.S. Wondering what happened to those beach-themed favors I was so enamored with? They got scrapped because they didn't match the evening ballroom reception we ended up booking, and thank goodness for that. — Stefania

— Kristen O'Gorman Klein and Stefania Sainato

The Flower Foolery..

So, Scott and I met with a Friend of a Family Member about doing our flowers for our wedding.. Our thought was that we didn't need a big bank of flowers but for sure some to complement the day.

We have been communicating for about a year and about a month ago, things went south.

We had set up a meeting to talk with him about details and have not heard from him since. I tried to keep contacting him but still no avail. I was freaking out and in a bit of panic because I didn't understand how we had not heard from him at all.


So since Friday, I have been online, searching and looking for a florist in our Price range. The bouquets and Boutonnieres were not my issue as much as the centerpieces were. I was getting discouraged... Until my MOH Sheauen said, You know you don't need to have flowers as centerpieces..... EUREKA YOUR RIGHT!

So we went on a hunt for alternatives for Centerpieces and here is what I found:

And after searching and searching we came up with the PERFECT IDEA....CUPCAKES!!!

Scott and I's wedding colors are Chocolate, Vanilla and Red Velvet, So our accidental theme would be Sweet Treats! Its a great idea to incorporate one of favorites sweets EVER!  Now the question became... How do we present the sweet treats... One Idea was Cupcake Stands/Plates/ Tier

Then we thought it would be good to do a Cupcakes in Boxes Pyramid Style.

Then I found something that would work in more ways than one and be a triple threat.....

Its the perfect idea.... The boxes will serve as place cards and when the guest get to the table, there will find a tower of Cupcakes as centerpieces! Towards the end of the night, they can take their cupcake and put in their place card/cupcake box!!


That lets me breathe a little easier.. Now all we have to do is get a florist for the ceremony items we need and we are set.

And hopefully... The Flower Foolery will come to an end.

Notes to make me Smile, Hazelnut Deliciousness and Isaiah's 1st Sleepover

Hey Blog Friends... Here is my weekend recap:

Friday I got off of work and was exhausted but still had to get Jacelyn to cheer practice. I came home and found a note from Scott that made it all better:

I swear I love that man.. He knows how to make a girl smile.

We had Isaiah this weekened (Yay!) So we did a family grocery shopping trip and Chili Dogs for dinner ....yum!

Saturday Morning we woke up and laid in bed for a while...

Then I got up and made breakfast for the family and made myself some Hazelnut Coffee that we ground fresh at Winco the night before...

After breakfast and cleaning... We head out to Oceanside to hang with The Murray for the weekend. I was driving so I didnt get to take any pictures of the car ride but Scott was able to take one of a SUV...

Yeah.... There were no true words for it all.

We arrived at The Murrays and as always it was good to see them. Allison welcomed Isaiah, Jacelyn and Jazz over for a Sleep Over. We also had Taco Night and here are a few photos....

 

The Boys: Loic, Isaiah and Jake

The Girls: Jillian and Jacelyn (Missing Sydney who was running around)

Chef Allison cooking them up.

Scott helping set up the Taco Bar

After leaving the kids at Allison's, Scott, The Murrays and I went back around to their home and watched more of the Olympics. I got a chance to see Sanya Richards Ross:

This chick is BAD in the world of Track and Field and I was happy to gert a chance to see her run. She was also one of my favorite Brides on Platinum Weddings. She is married to Superbowl Champ (New York Giants) Aaron Ross:

They are too cute together...

After a long day Sparky, One of the Murrays Dog, decided to fall asleep between Scott and I.. and we knew that was our cue that the day was over:

Sunday we got up and went with The Murrays to Breakfast at Broken Yolk Cafe. I had waffles in honor of National Waffle Day and Scott had Eggs Benedict of course.

After Breakfast, we went and picked up the kids and headed back home... Isaiah said he was not tired but you be the judge.... Man Down

Sunday night we had dinner with my Parents and turned in to start the busy week. Here is what is on tap:

1. Flower Issues continued (See next post)

2. Finally get a Hat for Bridal Shower

3. Pick Up my Dress... SO EXCITED

4. Walk for Life on Saturday

5. School Shopping for Jacelyn.. Hopefully

82 days to go... Man time is flying but I am ready!

To Veil or Not to Veil? - Project Wedding

To Veil or Not to Veil? - Project Wedding

Top 10 Tips to Plan Your Wedding Your Way

Summer means weddings, whether planning your own or participating in one. June is the most popular month of the year to get married, with August coming in a close second.
My August wedding was almost 20 years ago, yet the memories of planning and preparation are still as vivid as the event itself. The legal ceremony requires little else besides the license, bride, groom, officiant and witnesses, but from there anything goes and is indicative of the personal creativity and budget constraints of the couple getting married.

Tip 1: Make it meaningful.
Remember that your commitment to love each other is the reason for this occasion, so make it meaningful to you as a couple. Music has been an important part of our life, so we gave it an integral place in our special day. Our flower girl (groom's sister) even danced her way down the aisle dropping the dried flower petals I had saved from the many bouquets my fiance had given me.

Tip 2: Name your price.
Decide the amount you want to spend and how much you can comfortably afford; then create a budget that works each desired element into the total cost. The average wedding in the United States costs almost $30,000. But just because you can spend that much, doesn't mean you should. Some couples prefer to use that money for a car or a down payment on a house. Our friends and family members offered their skills as photographer, caterer, musician, event planner, florist and seamstress. The talented participation of our loved ones enabled us to have a memorable day on a smaller budget and surrounded us with a supportive camaraderie.

Tip 3-6: Determine who, what, when, and where.
Each of those four integral words will need distinctive determinations for each option you include in your events. Attendants, attire, parties, ceremony, reception and other related activities bring a myriad of choices. For us it was worth it. It was fun to have interesting aspects reflect our personalities.
Sixteen years ago, we were part of our close friends' gorgeous garden wedding. At their rehearsal dinner we surprised them with a quasi-rap song we wrote just for them. To this day, mutual friends chant the memorable refrain of "Hey, hey, hey, it's your wedding day...."

Tip 7: Discuss the event without discord.
Difficult decisions will need to be made, and differences will surface. Tensions can escalate further when the desires and finances of parents are involved. Choosing the guest list, as well as the wedding party, can be very stressful and may determine the size of the event, which affects cost and location. Focus on what really matters to each of you and keep a healthy perspective. My husband and I have very different ideas so we agreed early on to find solutions that we would both be comfortable with. The enormity of details and the stress of making decisions have led many to elope! Take a deep breath and read these top 10 tips again.

Tip 8: Aspire to be inspired.
Go surfing!! Well, it is summer, and beach ceremonies are popular events...but I really mean, surf the web. Cedar hope chests were commonly given to girls as a coming-of-age gift in the 1950s and '60s. Precious items were collected and stored in hopes of a glorious wedding day and married life. Today, the modern equivalent is Pinterest, the online site where men and women freely save, sort, and swoon over ideas, images and information organized by category and personalized with a pin-it feature. Social media has expanded our sphere of reference, and you can like Weddings on Facebook and follow them on Twitter.

Trends come and go and wedding styles are no exception. From elopements to destination weddings, classic traditions blend with new ideas. Sending out electronic Save the Dates has become a standard practice that was unheard of two decades ago, even by regular mail. Martha Stewart's huge Tiffany blue wedding book was the definitive go-to resource when I was planning, along with a few classic bridal magazines. Now Martha has a site devoted to all things weddings, as does world-renowned event planner Colin Cowie. LifeTips has more than 1,000 tips in 26 different wedding-related categories.

Tip 9: Stay organized.
Planning and preparation will keep your dream wedding from becoming a nightmare. Numerous websites offer free online tools. Even if you hire a wedding planner, detailed lists are a must. Some brides begin a checklist as early as 16 months in advance. Emergencies may happen even with the best-laid plans, but serendipity can be found in the midst of a mess. Minutes before I walked down the aisle, my heirloom lace wedding dress (groom's grandmother's) needed a last-minute repair. The private time my mom and I shared as she calmly mended it was precious.

Tip 10: Enjoy your wedding, your way.
This is your time to sparkle and shine! The intense planning and preparation and the many events from engagement announcements to parties and showers all lead to the ceremony and reception that begin your life as a married couple. We coordinated a wedding weekend itinerary with out-of-town friends and family before we left for our honeymoon. Bask in every exciting moment; then relax together at a romantic resort, bed and breakfast, upscale inn or boutique hotel.

--Shirley Anitra Swagerty

Wedding Receptions: Reception After-Party Primer

Any bride will tell you that the reception flies by. But the last dance doesn't have to signal the end of the celebration. There are always revelers who refuse to let the good times come to a close, so it's essential to have an after-hours game plan. It isn't just a way to prolong your wedding day (and you will appreciate every extra minute) -- consider it another chance to impress your guests with surprising details and personal touches. Here's how to get the party started.

Settle on a Style

There are three types of post-wedding paths: one is the somewhat spontaneous let's-meet-at-a-bar gathering where guests show up and pay their way; two is the our-own-room-in-a-bar route with or without an open tab; and the third is the well-organized-wedding-part-two celebration where guests continue in the open-bar revelry with or without added entertainment (a DJ, pool tables, sundae bar). The main differences are the legwork, cost, and possibility of snafus (mainly that the bar is overcrowded). Once you decide what type of after-party you want, the rest of the decisions will come easy.
After-party Pointer: Even if you go for the low-maintenance, meet-at-a-bar kind of party, call at least a week ahead to make sure they haven't booked any private parties for that night. You don't want to be scrambling around town in your wedding gown, looking for a good bar.

Invite Right

The best thing about planning the after-party is that traditional wedding etiquette need not apply. Yes, everyone should feel welcome to join, but official invites are simply not necessary. If you want to ensure all your guests are aware of the post-wedding festivities (and won't make other plans), include the after-party info on a separate card to be sent with your wedding invitations. Or, post it on your wedding website with a link to the venue. Destination weddings will do right with the info listed on the weekend's schedule of events. For a more low-key after-party, it's fine to let everyone know about the plan through word of mouth -- start spreading the news at the shower and bachelorette party.
After-party Pointer: Deciding who to invite to the after-party is simple: If they're invited to the reception, they should be invited to the after-party. Even if you know some of your guests won't be up for partying after the reception, still extend the invitation so no one feels snubbed. That said, you can position the party as a mainly friends affair by choosing a hip location like the new lounge in town or a billiards club. But if your parents and their friends want to attend, they should still be welcome with open arms.

Choose a Convenient Spot

You'll hear lots of compliments and praise from your friends and family throughout your reception, so use the after-party to show your guests how much you appreciate them. When you choose your after-party venue, remember the old real estate axiom: what matters most is location, location, location. Make sure the after-party is somewhere that's convenient to the reception. If the majority of your out-of-town guests are staying in the same area, find a nearby bar or lounge. If you're having your reception in a hotel ballroom, check if you can rent a smaller room -- or even a suite, if your guest list is small -- in the same hotel to host your party.
After-party Pointer: By the time your reception is over, at least a few of your guests will probably have had a bit too much to drink. Transportation to the after-party should be one of your main concerns -- if the venue is not within walking distance, consider booking a shuttle to get guests around safely, or hire a few cabs to wait outside your reception space when it's finished.

Vary the Decor

You've thought through every detail to make your guests gasp when they see your reception space -- go for the same reaction when they enter your after-party. To wow them once again, you'll need unexpected décor, so pick a theme that's different from your reception. If you've stuck with a formal, classic style throughout your wedding, make your after-party a little more laid back by giving out leis and serving tropical cocktails. If you chose big band classics for your reception tunes, hire a DJ to play all your '80s favorites at the after-party. Had a casual outdoor ceremony and reception? Treat your guests to a Latin-themed after-party, complete with salsa band, mojito bar, and cigars rolled to order.
After-party Pointer: When you pick your after-party theme, make sure it matches your personalities. If you and your friends have more fun at the neighborhood bar than at a super swank club, don't feel like your party needs to be ultraposh -- making everyone comfortable is an important step to after-party success.

Feed the Crowd

You served a delicious dinner at the reception, but after hours of dancing and drinking, your guests are going to be hungry. Whether you opt for an open bar at your after-party, you should also offer your guests something to snack on. Follow the rules of décor. Just like it's smart to vary the look of reception and the after-party, it's also a good idea to serve a different type of food. If your main dish at dinner was salmon, a sushi bar at your after-party might be fish overload. And it doesn't have to be too fancy -- we know a couple who served mini burgers, fries, and milkshakes for a tasty midnight snack.
After-party Pointer: Do you have to have an open bar? Well, that's up to you and your budget. Open bar is always appreciated, but the decision also depends on where and what kind of after-party you're throwing. If you've rented out a room or a suite at your reception site, yes, open bar is essential. If you've rented out a private space at a bar, it's a generous and appropriate gesture. If it's a less formal, let's-hit-this-bar type of event, it's not necessary.

Wear What You Want

Even if the after-party is held in the bar next door, you can generally expect everyone to stay in their party clothes. If it's held at the hotel where everyone's staying, many guests will want to change into more casual gear. That's fine, unless the after-party room has a dress code. It's considerate to let your guests know what sort of attire is expected after the reception's over. If you're planning a casual after-party, tell your guests they should feel free to change out of their formalwear and into something more comfortable. If you think it'd be fun to coordinate the attire with your party's décor (like a black and white theme, or a Hawaiian luau), make your plans clear beforehand so no one feels left out by dressing inappropriately.
After-party Pointer: If you want to sport your white dress ‘til dawn, go for it. Play the princess card for as long as you wish. Just know, every extra hour you're in your gown -- especially around food and drinks -- you run the risk of staining your dress. If you're wearing a two piece gown, consider changing into jeans and leaving the top on.

Cover the Costs

So, who's paying? Chances are there will be many a guest offering to slap down their credit cards at the bar. Because the after-party is a relatively new wedding trend, there's no set etiquette for who traditionally pays. The bride's parents may consider it part of the reception and pay for the after-party, especially if it's taking place in the same hotel or resort, since it can be easily added to the final bill. On the other hand, many couples choose to pay for the after-party themselves, regardless of who pays for the wedding, since the attendees will generally be the couple's younger friends. If you're uncertain on who's planning on paying, consider offering to split the bill with your parents. No need to go overboard -- if you're worried about overspending, just put a cap on the open bar after an hour or two.
After-party Pointer: All good things must come to an end, including your wedding day. If you're renting a space, you probably have an allotted amount of time, so deciding when to go home can be pretty clear cut. Otherwise, if you and your husband are up for it, there's no reason you can't celebrate till dawn! If you're hosting a brunch or leaving early for your honeymoon the next morning, make sure you've got someone to give you a wakeup call so you don't oversleep.

Thanks to Pamela Barefoot of Atrendy Wedding & Event Company; Melissa Paul of Evantine Design



-- Miles Stiverson

Friday Letters

Dear Me,

I know the last few weeks have been a roller coaster but hey, we have been through worse and we lived to tell about it. We will get where we need to be. Love you!

Dear Flower Gods,

Have mercy on Scott and I in this process of finding flowers for the wedding. I know you will do what you can to make sure it is all right.

Dear Wedding Dress,

I'm coming for you baby... SO EXCITED!

Dear Bridal Shower,

3 weeks!!!

Dear Brides Magazine,

Thanks for the OPI polish, It was a nice treat in the mail this week that made me smile. It looks to be the PERFECT Wedding Polish Color.

Dear Scott,

We are 85 days away and it is so great to be apart of your world. Congrats on the new job you started this week and I Love You!



The Reception Etiquette Guide - Project Wedding

The Reception Etiquette Guide - Project Wedding

Real Wedding Vows You'll Love

Whether you want to get your guests giggling or grabbing for the Kleenex, penning your promises will truly personalize your wedding. Steal ideas from these self-written vows from real couples.

Short and Sweet Vows

Alithea & Jevan
GroomI promise to love and care for you, and I will try in every way to be worthy of your love.
I will always be honest with you, kind, patient and forgiving.
I promise to try to be on time.
But most of all, I promise to be a true and loyal friend to you.
I love you.
BrideI promise to love and care for you, and I will try in every way to be worthy of your love.
I will always be honest with you, kind, patient and forgiving.
I promise to keep a sense of humor.
But most of all, I promise to be a true and loyal friend to you.
I love you.

Amy & Russell
Groom & BrideYou are my lover and my teacher,
You are my model and my accomplice,
And you are my true counterpart.
I will love you, hold you and honor you,
I will respect you, encourage you and cherish you,
In health and sickness,
Through sorrow and success,
For all the days of my life.

Laine & Shane
Groom & BrideI promise to be your lover, companion and friend,
Your partner in parenthood,
Your ally in conflict,
Your greatest fan and your toughest adversary.
Your comrade in adventure,
Your student and your teacher,
Your consolation in disappointment,
Your accomplice in mischief.
This is my sacred vow to you, my equal in all things. all things.

 

Poetic Vows

Anne & Gabrielle
Both BridesI take you to be my partner for life
I promise above all else to live in truth with you
And to communicate fully and fearlessly
I give you my hand and my heart
As a sanctuary of warmth and peace
And pledge my love, devotion, faith and honor
As I join my life to yours.

Alexandra & Benim

GroomIn your eyes, I have found my home.
In your heart, I have found my love.
In your soul, I have found my mate.
With you, I am whole, full, alive.
You make me laugh. You let me cry.
You are my breath, my every heartbeat.
I am yours.
You are mine.
Of this we are certain.
You are lodged in my heart.
The small key is lost.
You must stay there forever.

BrideYou are my inspiration and my soul's fire.
You are the magic of my days.
You help me laugh, you teach me love.
You provide a safe place for me, unlike I've ever known.
You free me to sing my own song.
You are more of an amazement to me, each day I rediscover you.
You are my greatest boon.
I am yours.
You are mine.
Of this we are certain.
You are lodged in my heart.
The small key is lost.
You must stay there forever.
Frau Ava (circa 1160), translated by Willis Barnstone

Mike & Anne
Groom & BrideOn this day,
I give you my heart,
My promise,
That I will walk with you,
Hand in hand,
Wherever our journey leads us,
Living, learning, loving,
Together,
Forever.

Twist-on-Tradition Vows

Kristin & Josh
Groom & BrideI believe in you, the person you will grow to be and the couple we will be together. With my whole heart, I take you as my wife/husband, acknowledging and accepting your faults and strengths, as you do mine.
I promise to be faithful and supportive and to always make our family’s love and happiness my priority.
I will be yours in plenty and in want, in sickness and in health, in failure and in triumph.
I will dream with you, celebrate with you and walk beside you through whatever our lives may bring.
You are my person -- my love and my life, today and always.

Michelle & Alex
GroomI promise to encourage your compassion,
Because that is what makes you unique and wonderful.
I promise to nurture your dreams,
Because through them your soul shines.
I promise to help shoulder our challenges,
For there is nothing we cannot face if we stand together.
I promise to be your partner in all things,
Not possessing you, but working with you as a part of the whole.
Lastly, I promise to you perfect love and perfect trust,
For one lifetime with you could never be enough.
This is my sacred vow to you, my equal in all things.

BrideI promise to encourage your individuality,
Because that is what makes you unique and wonderful.
I promise to nurture your dreams,
Because through them your soul shines.
I promise to help shoulder our challenges,
Because through them we'll emerge stronger.
I promise to be your partner in all things,
Not possessing you, but working with you as a part of the whole.
I promise to share with you the joys of life,
Because with you they will be that much sweeter.
Lastly, I promise to you perfect love and perfect trust,
For one lifetime with you could never be enough.
This is my sacred vow to you, my equal in all things.

Danielle & Gregory
GroomI love you for your beauty, your intelligence, your kindness...and for the way you always know how to make me feel so special. So on top of all the other vows that I will make to you on our wedding day, I also vow to always appreciate how lucky I am to have someone who makes me feel the way you do and to continue to try as hard as I can to make you feel as special as you make me feel, forever and ever.

BrideYou have been my best friend, mentor, playmate, confidant and my greatest challenge. But most importantly, you are the love of my life and you make me happier than I could ever imagine and more loved than I ever thought possible.... You have made me a better person, as our love for one another is reflected in the way I live my life. So I am truly blessed to be a part of your life, which as of today becomes our life together.

-- Allison Micarelli

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Important Questions To Ask Your Vendors

Sharon Sacks

President and Founder, Sacks Productions

The beginning stage of planning is such an exciting time, but it can also be daunting. Between the venue, the menu, the guests, and the gown, you might think: where do I begin? My answer is to just take a deep breath, because the fun has just begun.
Start by browsing through magazines, online sites, blogs, and of course Pinterest! You will be surprised what innovative ideas will catch your eye. With all these exciting ideas floating around your head, you may forget to ask some of the most important questions of your vendors. Before meeting with each of the vendors that you have in mind, you need to have a detailed list of questions prepared. Asking these important questions will help assure there will be no surprises along the way!

Dress

Close your eyes, and picture yourself on your special evening. What is your overall look? Is it glamour, vintage, or romantic? Having a clear vision of your ideal style will help guide you when you are shopping for the all the pieces that will come together for your final look.
Another suggestion is to take someone you trust with you when shopping. It always helps to have the extra eyes of the people that matter around you. That being said, don't take too many people with you, or else you'll put yourself under unnecessary stress.
It is essential to confirm that the bridal gown store will be able to complete the gown for you on time without rushing. Some may need six months, while others only need three months. When placing your order, ask that the gown be completed at least a week prior to your date. That way, there is a bit of extra time in case you need last minute adjustments. My brides always feel comfortable knowing that the perfect dress is hanging in their closets and ready for the big day.
Also, ask how many fittings will be needed and be certain that works with your schedule. I always suggest that you do your hair and make-up trial when you are going for a fitting. Have whoever accompanies you take a photograph so you can be sure the total look is exactly the way you imagined.

Photographer

I love looking back at photographs of a wedding. They tell the story behind the big day, reminding you of all the beautiful memories and emotions. There are so many different styles of photography to consider. It is important to know exactly what feeling you want to capture on this evening of commitment and romance. Is it a photojournalist style (like capturing the moment with candid snaps) or should each picture be styled and composed? Is it a photographer shooting with film or digital, color or black and white? Look at magazines for different styles, or browse through friends' wedding photos to get a better idea and what you like (and what you definitely don't). I promise you once you are interviewing photographers it will all become clear.
When you are quoted a figure be sure you are clear about the amount of hours they will be on site. How many staff will attend? If you have a party of over 100 people, you may want two shooters -- not just a photographer and an assistant. The reason being that one camera can be with the Groom and his groomsmen and the other with the Bride and her bridesmaids. Your safety net is making a list of the people you want included in photographs. This is a much easier way for the photographer to understand your priorities, and you can feel confident that will have shots of the most important people in your life.
Be sure to ask what is included in the fee. Will you be receiving a photo album and if so, how many photos are included? Ask to see the options of albums. Will you be able to preview on the web and if so how much time will be needed before completed? In their experience, what is the turnaround time? Make sure everything is in your contract!

Florist/Floral Designer

When selecting a designer and florist for your wedding, you need to remember that this is the element that helps create the feeling that you want to capture. Your florist/designer has the ability to offer you more than just floral embellishments. If your budget allows you to add some personal touches reach out for these suggestions from your floral expert. Questions to keep in mind when speaking with a potential florists are: May I view your portfolio? What type of vessels are available? Have you ever worked at my wedding location? Give them a budget and ask them if they can work within the budget. If the answer is yes, then ask to look at prior parties that had similar budgets. At the time of year of your wedding, what flowers will be available? Pick those favorites and ask if they will fall within your budget. Ask if you can customize and if the florist will be there to set everything up. You don't want to be let down the day of your wedding and not see the person you built up your ideas with be absent.

Band & Music

If there is one thing that creates the right mood of the evening, it is the music. It is an essential element that will set the tone for dinner and your after-party. There is nothing like building the mood and adding layers of meaning to each part of the night. Your guests will follow you and your fiancé, so plan on wearing comfortable shoes that you can dance in all night long. If possible, I highly recommend choosing a band instead of a DJ, as there is nothing greater than live music. Besides listening to some demos, it is important to contact past references and see how the band turned out. Demo reels are great to listen to but they can be modified and altered so it's useful to speak to somebody who had the opportunity to listen to them live. Once you double check with the references, you can start asking the band questions. How many hours are in the contract? Is there an overtime fee? What is your song list like? Can they play your favorite song? What kind of power requirements do they need? Will this work with the venue? Do they need breaks? How many? You certainly don't want to get stuck with a diva! Do they require a meal? Is there an extra fee for continuous music? How many band members are there? The more questions you ask, the more confident you will feel about your music will be perfect on your special day.

Caterer

Your guests will be spending a significant portion of their night dining, which means you will want to ask many questions to ensure your guests are happy! Generally caterers break down their costs into price per person. You need to ask what exactly is included in this price. Many times, there is an additional service charge and tax that is added to this price. The great thing about this is that you will know the exact costs going into your big day. There shouldn't be any surprises doing it this way. Is there an additional charge for hors d'oeuvres? Cocktail drinks? Besides pricing, you will want to ask specific questions about the food. Does your guest list include a lot of "foodies"? If so, you may want to customize the menu to make the dishes unique. Does Grandma Irene have the most amazing pie recipe? Maybe your caterer can try to recreate this dish. It's these special touches that the guests will remember long after their plates are cleared. Is a tasting included in the package so you can have a sneak peek before the big day, and possibly make some changes if necessary? If you have two or three choices to make with the menu, they should all be there to sample at the tasting! You will also want to make sure the dishes are also visually appealing, so ask them to plate the dishes as they would be served at the wedding during your tasting. You want to ensure that your dishes both taste good AND look good! Don't be afraid to ask them to change whatever you don't like.

Along with the food, you will want to ask numerous questions about the drinks. What brands of alcohol? Do you charge a corkage fee if you provide our own wine or champagne? Are drinks charged per drink or per person? If your old fraternity buddies are coming to the wedding and you know they can drink up a storm, you may want to see what option will be most cost effective.
While we all fear that planning for a dream wedding can quickly spiral into a nightmare (and nobody wants to be a bridezilla), the best way to stop any last minute disasters is to be prepared.

By going into each vendor meeting with a clear vision and a slew of important questions, you can be sure that everyone in your party planning team is on the same page. That way, instead of stressing the details, you can celebrate one of the most special days of your life.

Photo of the Week

This Photo of the Week is from Scott's First Trip to The Hollywood Bowl. It was a great night out for us, We got to spend some fun time with our friend Esther (Hey Wu) and you see our seats?? Awesome! I am looking forward to a lifetime of exploring and discovery with the man I will soon call my Husband.

Top 20 Honeymoon Resorts in the United States Honeymoons: Brides.com

Top 20 Honeymoon Resorts in the United States Honeymoons: Brides.com